I should be packing...

...but I am not. Nope I am not. And I am not ashamed, I will advertise my laziness for the world to see. Actually, I don't think "laziness" is the real culprit here. The minute I think about what I still need to do before, during, and after I move, I feel so overwhelmed that have the sensation of slowly sinking under water. Although I have made quite a bit of headway, I have a closet and a garage that have become a time capsule of clutter. Two years worth of carelessly stashed things that maybe didn't matter... Or I couldn't figure out how they mattered at the time. Last night I had a dream that I was all packed up, had a bunch of people carrying my stuff, and then I couldn't find my new apartment! When I did find it, it more closely resembled a hospital room. Bathroom and a bed. Somehow, this is not a good sign.

However, I did get to FINALLY see my new place today, and even though it is quite a bit smaller than the place I am used to, it is a far cry from a hospital ward. It seems my new apartment manager may share my frustration with my current manager's constant absenteeism... A cleverly placed smirk on her part seemed to tell me so.

And then... I get home... AND SOMEONE HAS TAKEN OUR MAIL! GREAT! I have no idea what to do. This has never happened to me before, and it is surprisingly violating. I just hope the mailman left it open and some kind person took it to the office. Of course, the absent landlady may be no help. Maybe my mail slipped into the same black hole that steals her away. Hmmm.

So... for a strange end to a strange day, I talked to a friend... someone I only know online, and even slightly at that... for a while and it turns out he is going through a lot of the same things I am right now. We discussed wine, velveeta, and separation. Yep. Oh, and how I am "stressed out beyond the edge of reason", much like the door to my closet and the shelves in my garage. These things have become my dirty little secrets, a part of me that I don't even want to admit exists. Especially the velveeta.

~Wildflower