Fruit on bottom, hope on top

Ok, so great quote I heard on comedy radio today, but I am not sure quite how to apply it here. It just really got my attention today. If you don't know, it comes from the late comedian Mitch Hedberg (http://www.mitchhedberg.net/) who always made me laugh. The quote above refers to yogurt and contests on the back of those little lids, but for some reason today it described exactly how I felt, and yet I have no idea why. Maybe I feel fruity with a layer of hope over it? heh I don't think that's quite it but it is something to think about. If you have any of your own thoughts about the quote, I'd love to hear them. For now... I think Family Guy is calling me.

Till later!

~Wildflower

Test

Ok... so many of you have heard the rumor that the Mr. and I are no longer together. Which is true. I moved back to my parents' house late Sunday night/very early Monday morning. Thanks to SleeplessWalrus and Appalachainsalsa (the best brother in the world) for the help and Denny's trip at 3 AM. I don't know what else to say right now, I don't want to hurt anyone further or make things worse. What I can say is that I miss him greatly, and I didn't want things to end. In the absence of knowing what to say, I have a quiz below that Shan'Celle (see link) mentioned on her blog that she hoped I would take:

Seven things you plan to do before you die!!
1. Have children
2. Do something more professionally... just don't know what. Become a lawyer or professor are possibilities.
3. Visit Europe, and see family in Germany and Italy.
4. Overcome my compulsive eating.
5. Love myself without any conditions
6. Find true love.
7. Learn how to stand up for myself.

Seven things you can do!!
1. Learn how to stand up for myself.
2. Be alone without being sad.
3. Do something else professionally.
4. Lose weight-Lord knows I have done it before.
5. Learn to cook like my mother.
6. Drive a stick shift
7. Sing some kick-a$$ karaoke

Seven things you can't do!!!
1. Whistle. Just can't do it, damn genetics.
2. Completey rid myself of anxiety. I have learned to accept that part of it will always be there.
3. Act very well. I know people will argue with me, but I know the truth.
4. Control everything (ditto)
5. Stop loving people I have loved in the past.
6. Stop worrying about what I eat and when.
7. Stop worrying about whether people like me or not.

Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex!!
1. Dark Eyes/Hair
2. Smile
3. Sense of humor
4. Intelligence
5. That butt
6. Values
7. Willingness to stop everything and have fun

Seven things you say most!!!
1. I hate to type this but... "Sh!t"
2. "Oh my god"
3. "AHHHHHH"
4. "Um, ok"
5. "Is it drinking time?"
6. "I am so tired"
7. "I miss you"

Seven celebrity crushes!!!
1. Harrison Ford (especially in the Star Wars and Indie movies... yummm)
2. Christian Bale
3. Carey Elwes
4. Eddie Izzard (in heels as well)
5. Jim Carrey (yes I like silly men)
6. Jeff Goldblum
7. John Stamos (back from my teen days)


Seven people you want to take this quiz..
1. Monkey
2. Liese
3. Carolyn
4. Shelby
5. Katy
6. Bernice
7. Jeanine

plus whoever else would like too steal this is welcome to spread it around.

And add a little hope

So I had my first in a series of classes at Kaiser to help me overcome my compulsive eating. (For those of you who didn't know... wait, where have you been? I have known this for years! :-D ) It was interesting, but of course just scratched the surface... but we do have 9 more classes to cover more material. I felt a little weird when I was the only one who could honestly say that I have experience all types of binge eating (although on a usual basis I only experience two) but I was the only one who had not tried more than five diets or more and failed. Just a couple for me. But lots to learn... Anyway, getting back on my point of the post, we were 15 minutes into the class when a lady I knew from my anxiety groups in the spring rushes in the door. I was very excited because since the groups ended, I have thought about her a lot. She was in the anxiety groups because she was facing some possible (and serious) health problems (I can't be more specific for confidentiality reasons). As I got to know her then, I became absolutely amazed at how strong she was and how much empathy she had for everyone in the group, despite her situation being much more scary than ours. She was a great listener and always had something supportive to offer others... Well, I haven't seen her in over two months, and I will tell you I have been praying for her (yes, I pray in my own way... recognizing individual spirituality is a really good thing) throughout that time. After the class, we spent a few minutes catching up on how things are going for us over the last couple months... I was so relieved to hear that she is ok!!! I don't think I smiled that much in a while. Even more amazing, she remembered everything I was going through back then and asked me about it today (even though she could have possibly been through hell and back the last two months) and we talked about my progress as well. Then we got on to what brought us to the class today and a few other things, and it turns out we have quite a bit in common in the area of what we are seeking help for. I felt I had an ally and am actually looking forward to these classes for the next nine weeks. I came home, put on some music and danced in the kitchen while I made dinner. The whole experience made me remember the fortune cookie post, and thought that sometimes, when you least expect it, a little hope glows in front of you.

~Wildflower

Dessert Wisdom

A great "fortune" (although it is really not a fortune) I recently came across in a fortune cookie:

"Hope is a beautiful twilight that enhances every object."

It made me put down my yummy chien pi chicken and think.

~Wildflower

Cut my hair!!!

Anyone who liked my hair long may not want to see me for a while. LOL Today Susie cut my hair and I told her to really cut it ... And she did! It is just above my shoulders in the front and just below in the back... wow. I lost 2 1/2 inches of hair. Gonna dye it a bit lighter tonight too. For some reason I need a slightly different look. Does anyone get a little tired of looking into the mirror everyday and seeing the exact same thing? I don't mean absolute hatred of the way you look or anything, just a lot of boredom. I got some new makeup the other day too, so it must be what I going through. I need some new clothes too but don't have the money right now! Soon!

So... other than randomly chopping and dyeing hair, I am ok. A little grumpy for some odd reason, but ok. I got mad at dust on the floor last night, I kid you not. But I am thinking it will pass. I get my head shrunk on Thurs., maybe that will bring some insights. Oh well, for now, will do my best not to make any drastic changes ;)

~Wildflower